Total Balance

a bit of drama

2012-05-25T15:47:00.000+10:00

This is guaranteed to give you a laugh. Don't you just love the unexpected?

seeing

2012-05-14T10:03:00.000+10:00

I stumbled across this sweet little video today and thought you'd like it. The filmmaker is an 18-year-old who made the film on a $25 budget. Thoughtfully narrated and a beautiful piece of music backing it.

small treasures

2012-04-26T13:33:00.002+10:00

The first was a trip to Bright with Chris.

I had visited the High Country just once before, very briefly, when Chris was working on the second Man From Snowy River feature film. It was one of those bizarre weekends where things didn't go to plan.

On top of the long days he was doing, Chris had been travelling the three-and-a-half hour trip back from Merrijig each weekend to see me and he was exhausted. He wasn't coming down that weekend. So I decided to surprise him.

I walked into the Merrijig pub and found the rest of the crew – 'Oh no,' they said, 'Chris left two hours ago to drive to Melbourne to surprise you'. It was too late to travel back so I joined them at a crew party where Tom Burlinson made my night by introducing himself. As if I didn't know who he was!

Twenty-four years later, Chris and I made the journey back to the High Country together. This time we stayed at Bright instead. I can't tell you how beautiful it is up there at this time of year. We did lots of walking on Mt Buffalo (that tiny speck in the photo is me at View Point – one of the most spectacular views in the world) and we spent lazy hours in front of the open fire doing nothing much at all.

Then, last Sunday, my sister came to visit with her arms full of unexpected gifts. The cabbage roses were one thing but the most precious gift of all was that she visited with her six month old granddaughter (and my great-niece), Olive. It's incredible how easily your heart expands with love when a new baby arrives in the family.

And finally, on Tuesday, I was reading an article on the Business Chicks website and thinking about how wonderful the breakfast with Bob Geldof would be, when out of the blue, Sophie, the marketing manager extended an invitation to come along as a guest as a thank you for the articles I've been writing for them. How lucky I am. I'll let you know all about Bob once I've seen him. He's an inspiring role model so I can't wait.

Three lovely reminders about the things that really matter. Not that I don't love my work (I do) but my relationships and spending time in nature are the real treasures in my life.

What are yours?

the best made plans

2012-03-27T16:49:00.000+11:00

I woke up early this morning determined to make this week the week that I went to gym at least twice, yoga once and found time to walk on the other days.

Today was a gym morning. I left home a little later than usual so it took me forever to get there - and when I arrived I discovered that because of the Ironman competition, I couldn't park so I had to turn around and drive back again.

Even the best made plans are occasionally destined to fail and despite a lifelong habit of exercise, I find it hard to stay motivated when something like this happens.

I wanted to give myself an excuse to do nothing but I knew I'd feel better starting the week in a more positive way so I talked Chris into walking with me (luckily he's working from home today).

I'm so glad I did. It was such a beautiful day to be outside. There was a smell of the sea in the air and just a light breeze so a couple of yachts were out on the bay. A few older folk had braved a swim and sat glistening wet on a bench, soaking up the last of the summer rays.

It's magic down there. I know it's not as perfect as the ocean beaches that we love but still, it's a far cry from spending all day in front of the computer. I felt great that I had exercised - and I got to hang out with Chris.

yoga talk

2012-03-12T09:52:00.001+11:00

Here's a little laugh at ourselves.

an abundant life

2012-03-01T11:26:00.000+11:00

Developing The Change Project business and website has been a big undertaking. I've loved it and found it energising and inspiring in so many ways but in recent weeks, I've also found myself somewhat depleted. Like most projects, it went over budget and it has taken considerably more time than I had anticipated. And it has taken my attention away from Total Balance (as I knew it would). Which of course, has had its implications.

I don't doubt for a single second that it was the right decision but I've noticed that in the last week or so I've been focusing more on 'lack' than 'abundance'.

I try to be very conscious of the energy I bring to my work (and to my family) so it has concerned me to find myself feeling a bit drained. I'm lucky to have beautiful support people around me (my friend Lindy has been a particularly good listener lately) and my meditation and exercise help keep me sane.

But still, I hadn't been able to shake this niggling sense of anxiety.

Then last night something shifted.

With some reticence, I was having guests for dinner. I love cooking and entertaining, but it was a week night and I'm up against a tough deadline so I was feeling stretched for time (and as you will have gathered, lacking in energy).

The girls and Elsa's boyfriend, Toby were free to join us so there were seven of us in total. Sharing a simple meal and a bottle of wine with the people I love completely lifted my spirits. I realised afterwards, that I've been looking at things all the wrong way. I just need to reconnect with the sense of abundance in my life. There are so many things to be grateful for.

This morning, by pure coincidence, Robert Rabbin's latest blog post The Money Mirror arrived in my inbox. What a timely and generous reminder of how important it is to be aware of the choices we make every day and where we focus our energy.

Mine has suddenly shifted and today, everything seems brighter.

so very true

2012-02-16T16:25:00.002+11:00

Source: analyfe.com via Leah on Pinterest

what I'm listening to

2012-02-08T17:41:00.000+11:00

Meg (our youngest daughter) has a gift for finding great music. Her taste is really varied and she's one of those people who has the knack of discovering the best artists before they've become popular.

Quite a few years ago she was playing this song. It's quirky and beautiful and I loved it at the time. I have only just rediscovered it. When I found the clip, I researched Israel Kamakawiwo'ole. What an interesting man. Have a listen. I think you'll love it too.

a beautiful weekend

2012-01-30T19:35:00.001+11:00

It's been a long time since I've had my own camera - other than a little 'point-and-shoot' that I take with me when we travel. Chris decided it was time to find me something that would produce great images and be small enough to carry around every day.

After much research,we bought a beautiful little Sony NEX-5N. I say beautiful but it's not exactly the most visually appealing camera I've seen. I've always had a bit of a thing for a retro looking Leica but I couldn't really justify it.

Using great sites like the Photography Blog, Snapsort and DP Review we were able to make comparisons with other cameras, learn about the key features of each and view sample photographs. It was time consuming but worth it.

So finally we picked up my camera last week and I spent much of the weekend looking at the world through a lens.

I have loved taking photos for as long as I can remember (it was the interest that brought Chris and I together in the first place) and it makes the world of difference having a great camera. Every colour is vibrant and the sharpness of the images is incredible.

Taking the time to compose a photo makes you look more intently at colours and shapes and light, bringing you fully into the moment. Looking at the world through the lens of the camera made my weekend just a little more beautiful.

oh the places you'll go

2012-01-20T08:18:00.003+11:00

Here's a little treasure from our clever friends at Holstee. Follow their blog...they find and create the most beautiful things. And if you've never read the original version of the Dr Seuss book, go out and buy a copy. It's lovely....I gave a copy to Elsa when she turned 18.

harvest

2012-01-16T18:31:00.000+11:00

After blogging about the Economics of Happiness last month and posting the clip on Facebook, I had one lovely follower give me some tips about growing my own tomatoes.

I have to confess, I had some help. Chris' mother bought us a healthy looking tomato plant which was covered in flowers and for Christmas, Chris and the girls planted it into a half wine barrel, complete with beautifully rich organic soil, a marigold and some basil and parsley - and a dripper so it gets watered automatically. I couldn't have chosen a more perfect gift.

And look! Those are my own tomatoes. In that short space of time the fruit ripened and was ready to eat. They were sweet and delicious and it was completely satisfying knowing we'd grown them ourselves.

Metaphorically, I sowed lots of lovely seeds last year. The other one that has just come to life is a beautiful new website, designed by the clever and very talented Andrew Englisch. It's called The Change Project. It's an online resource centre to help people create positive change in life.

It's been so well received by the people who have seen it so far - I hope you like it too. There are some free downloads (MP3s and an eBook) available on the home page and there'll be lots of new blog posts (at least a couple of new articles each week). We'll be running eCourses and events and you'll find a range of natural therapists and coaches on the site from all over Australia.

Drop by and have a look and let me know what you think!

the economics of happiness

2011-12-07T13:31:00.001+11:00

Yesterday morning I caught the train into the city as I do every Tuesday and Thursday morning. I sat in a seat away from the window to catch the sun. As we pulled into the next station, I moved across so someone could sit next to me and as she sat down, the woman turned and smiled and said 'thank you'.

I rarely chat to people on trains or planes. I savour the time to myself. I read or listen to music or just daydream. But yesterday my companion and I struck up a conversation.

One thing led to another and she told me about a film that a friend had introduced her to on the weekend called 'The Economics of Happiness'. Who would have thought that a stranger on the train would tell me about something so engaging that I am now working out if I can possibly get to Berkeley, California next March to attend the conference.

Here's a preview. I hope you feel as inspired as I do.

what success really looks like

2011-11-24T10:46:00.000+11:00

Ah...how true. From http://www.facebook.com/ThingsAreBeautiful. Love your work.

life is short

2011-11-17T08:06:00.001+11:00

Here's another absolute gem. The Holstee Manifesto is a call to action to live a life full of intention, creativity, passion, and community. From the clever guys at Holstee.

on gratitude

2011-11-16T09:04:00.001+11:00

The lovely Cate from The Wellbeing Corner shared this little clip on her blog recently. I thought you'd enjoy it too. It's beautiful.

defining your values

2011-11-07T10:46:00.002+11:00

While I was away in Byron, I revisited my personal values. If you've never worked on your values, the best way to start is by creating a mind map. Use a big sheet of paper and lots of coloured textas or pencils. These help you to connect with the creative part of yourself. Put on your favourite music and allow yourself plenty of uninterrupted time.

What exactly are values?
Your values are your heart's deepest desire about how you want to live your life. They can describe how you want to be or they can be personal qualities you want to espouse.

Grouping your values
The image above is actually my second mind map. The first one was much more scattered and random. It included words that I found meaningful such as 'fairness' but ultimately, I found other ways to express the same value that resonated more for me. In this second mind map, I grouped the values from the earlier mind map into four main areas (inner harmony, health, creativity and connection). Collecting your values into no more than five simple categories makes them easier to remember.

Resist the urge to be perfect
You'll see that I've included some 'how' words as well in the creativity section (these are marked with a little cross). Technically, these aren't really correct - values are supposed to be more about how you want to 'be' rather than what you want to 'do'. But I resisted the urge to be perfect (something I find so difficult!). I was going to redo it but chose not to because I wanted you to see that it can be messy and imperfect and you can veer slightly off track but it will ultimately still serve the same purpose.

Are you aligned with your values?
Once you've refined your values, check in with them and see how you're tracking. My values don't change much but periodically I know that I'm more aligned with some and less aligned with others. What jumped out at me most this time was my need for 'space'. This is something I don't have a great deal of at the moment and an area that needs some attention. Another reason for me not redoing the mind map was that it was going to take time away from other things (essentially creating less 'space').

What are your values? And are you aligned with them?

byron bay retreat

2011-10-23T20:13:00.003+11:00

As soon as I arrived at Sangsurya to run this year's retreat, I remembered how much being there feels like an escape. The bush setting immediately connects you with nature. The birdsong, the lush garden and the ocean in the distance set a scene of complete calm.

We were blessed once again with a beautiful group of women. All with open, generous hearts. So it was just as wonderful as last year.

After it was over, Meg and Chris joined me in Byron Bay so we've just spent five days lazing about in the sun. We walked and read and Chris took beautiful photos.

And every day a humpback whale and her calf splashed about just off the shore.

spring cleaning

2011-10-05T18:30:00.001+11:00

There's something about spring that makes you want to fling open the doors and let a little fresh air in. And then you notice how grubby the windows are and how much dust has collected on the ceiling fan and how untidy your office looks. Well, if you're anything like me and you've let everything go over winter, you do.

I set aside a bit of time over the last few weekends to get organised and it's amazing what a difference it has made to my mental state. As soon as I started to tackle a few of those nasty jobs, I felt more motivated, more energised and so much more focused. Not to mention virtuous!

With the windows clean and a beautiful clear view of the garden from my desk, I was motivated to tidy my filing, reorganise the folders and files in my computer and I have even sent the tax stuff off to the accountant.

Despite the fact that it was all so dull and boring at the time, it's truly wonderful once it's done. As the saying goes, a tidy house is a tidy mind.

So get onto it! Do your spring cleaning. If you don't think you can handle it alone, get in touch with my lovely friend Claire from Organise Your Life. She'll help you get sorted out.

are you ok?

2011-09-15T16:14:00.002+10:00

Today is RUOK Day in Australia. The website describes it as 'a national day of action which aims to prevent suicide by encouraging Australians to connect with someone they care about and help stop little problems turning into big ones'.

It's another small initiative to help raise our awareness about the mental wellbeing of the people around us.

Sometimes we avoid meaningful conversations about how we're really feeling...I do it myself sometimes. It's often easier to respond with 'yeah, I'm good' rather than giving an honest answer and let's face it, there are plenty of times when it just wouldn't be
appropriate to answer truthfully.

But if you sense someone struggling, make it a priority to ask the question. Download the tips from the website and make time today (or later this week) to ask a friend, a family member, your partner or a colleague if they really are ok.

wired to worry

2011-09-09T09:41:00.003+10:00

'I am an old man and have known a great many troubles, but most of them never happened.' Mark Twain

I had a conversation with a client this week that reminded me of how often we worry unnecessarily. My client works with a manager who doesn't give her feedback. She's conscientious and committed to her job and a sensitive, thoughtful girl. She admitted that frequently, she thinks the worst about her boss' opinion of her. If he's snappy, she wonders what she might have done wrong. If he calls an impromptu meeting with her, she anticipates the worst.

Some of us have a natural propensity to worry. And it's often largely unhelpful.

If you're wired to be a worrier, try some of the ACT (Acceptance & Commitment Therapy) tools outlined in Russ Harris' book 'The Happiness Trap'.

Develop your self awareness so that you notice yourself worrying and tell yourself 'that's me doing my worrying thing again'. Notice how you feel when you worry - where it is in your body, what it does to your heart rate and any other changes you become aware of.
Don't beat yourself up about being a worrier. Initially, just notice how often it happens and label it as worry (this is the 'acceptance' part of ACT). The principal here is to recognise that difficult feelings are just difficult feelings that we will all experience them from time to time.
Finally, choose an action you can take that is aligned with your values. This is what Russ calls 'workable action' (the 'commitment' part of ACT). Sometimes the action might be related to the worry - have a conversation that needs to be had or take control of an area of your life that is making you unhappy. But at other times the action may be to simply get busy with something to take your attention away from the worry. Exercise or any other vigorous activity (such as cleaning the house, washing the car, mowing the lawn) can be good.

Over time, defusing worry in this way helps to limit its grip on you.

what I've noticed

2011-08-19T18:27:00.001+10:00

Chris and I have been travelling for the past three weeks. We've been in Italy and Spain and we've had the most wonderful time.

One of the things I love to do most when we're away is to sit in a cafe and watch the world go by.

I'm fascinated at how much all people are the same, even with our subtle differences. Here are some of the things I noticed.

All small boys love throwing stones into a body of water and playing with running taps...and all of their mothers get stressed about their shoes getting wet.

Italian women wear heels everywhere. Even in the most inappropriate places (like getting on and off ferries and hiking up steep cobbled streets in Varenna, Lake Como).

French women are the most stylishly dressed women in the world. You can pick them anywhere.

Every place in the world looks its best as the sun is setting. And it's the perfect time of day to sit and enjoy a glass of wine.

The most delicious food in the world is simple. The Italians do this so well. They turn freshly made pasta, beautiful quality olive oil and parmigiano, tomato and basil into one of the best summer dishes I've ever eaten.

Most people are considerate and courteous. We're in Barcelona at the moment it's absolute peak holiday season. There are literally millions of people in the city and it's noisy and hot. Yet people queue patiently to get into museums and galleries with little complaint.

European women are great at celebrating their bodies - regardless of shape or size. In Barcelona, you're never too old or too big to wear a bikini.

And finally, Melbourne does the best coffee in the world. Who would have thought?

Visit our Facebook page if you're interested in seeing some pics.

what I'm listening to

2011-07-21T17:00:00.000+10:00

I love music. And I particularly love discovering something new. Our girls introduce us to some great artists so I figured I should share some of them with you from time to time. Here's one of my faves. This guy has the most beautiful voice.

on being vulnerable

2011-07-05T21:47:00.000+10:00

A few people sent me a link to this talk just over a week ago...which was very thoughtful. It's nice that my friends (and even clients) know me so well. They knew I would find Brene Brown to be yet another inspiring woman. You'll love this talk. It's well worth the twenty minutes. I've watched it twice already (and I never watch anything twice!)

inspiring women

2011-06-27T10:37:00.001+10:00

I was looking for a gift for a favourite friend on Friday and remembered Queen B candles. These beautiful beeswax candles are handmade here in Australia. I called the number on the website to find a Melbourne stockist and was lucky enough to speak with Cate, the owner of the business.

We talked for about twenty minutes and realised some serendipity - we have a shared friend, we like the same blogs and we're passionate about similar things.

I came away from that call feeling completely inspired. It made me reflect on the fact that in the past week my path has been crossed by at least a dozen inspiring women - some friends, some clients and some, like Cate, complete strangers.

Here are a few I consider worthy of a mention.

I had an impromptu coffee at Eclipse with Liz from Lizzy C on Tuesday. She's an amazing young woman. As well as being a brilliant photographer with a very successful little business, she lives a creative, adventurous life that's aligned with her values. Every time I see her she has some new project on the go or a new trip in the planning.

On Thursday I made an appointment to see a kinesiologist because my hip has been quite sore after all the yoga. I contacted Kerry from Awaken Kinesiology who I felt I already knew after following her blog for a year. She was as warm and as genuine as she comes across in her posts - and she's obviously completely passionate about her work.

I chatted with four beautiful women who have all walked away from mainstream jobs to do something creative that they're passionate about. Shelley from Galerie Montmartre, Stef from Nest PR, Sarah from denu and Nadine from Think Nimble.

And while I didn't speak to them this week, I have to include Lucy from The Design Files and Jodie Fried from Bholu on this list. These gorgeous girls are two of the most inspiring I know. Lucy has created a business that I'm sure she'd say is beyond what she ever imagined it would be. I have no doubt that a huge degree of her success comes from the fact that she's genuinely one of the nicest (and most humble) people I have met. As is Jodie. As well as establishing a socially conscious business, Jodie has an ongoing commitment to give back - designing, building and sustaining ten pre schools in India for a community who were desperately in need.

And finally, I want to mention for a treasured friend, Lindy. Like the other women I've mentioned, she's doing what she's passionate about. She walked away from a regular job years ago to set up a couple of small businesses, but both are on hold for the moment because she's found her dream role - being a mother. And she's undertaking that role with a wholeheartedness that is a joy to be around.

I am completely inspired by each of these women and it's an absolute pleasure to have them in my life. If you have time, read their stories. Hopefully you'll be inspired too.

being on retreat

2011-06-21T19:00:00.002+10:00

Meg emailed a couple of months ago to tell me she wanted to go on a yoga and meditation retreat for her 20th birthday. She asked me if I'd like to join her and we have just returned from nine heavenly days in Bali.

I haven't done a lot of yoga before - mostly my exercise consists of gym and walking. But I loved it. My body is still a bit weary after almost five hours a day but interestingly, I haven't felt as rested in years.

Before we left I didn't give a lot of thought to what we'd be eating but it turned out to be a complete detox too. We ate beautiful vegetarian food and had no alcohol or dairy and very little coffee, wheat or sugar. It's amazing how you don't even miss those things when you're not around them. We did treat ourselves to a latte and a shared tiramisu one morning at Indus (their delicious sweets are cooked at Casa Luna where you can take cooking classes that come highly recommended). As Meg said, you can't imagine how much you enjoy a treat when you haven't had one for over a week.

We're hoping to find a way to make this happen every year if we can. It was the nicest way for us to spend some time together.

Vanessa and Michael (who ran the retreat) don't have any others coming up soon, but one of the other participants, Rose Hawkins is also a yoga teacher (and the most beautiful person) and she's running her retreat in Italy in September if you feel inspired.

Or join us in 2012 for our very own meditation retreat at the same beautiful location.